Andrew (perspectivism) wrote,
Andrew
perspectivism

So!

This one time, at Costco...

3:30 this afternoon, I was weaving in & out of the checkout lines. I was looking to optimize my situation. Fact: I'm holding a gallon of Naked orange juice & a bunch of frozen swordfish. Issue: I'd like to leave the store with them, without risking detention for grand theft swordfish, and in less than five minutes.

Too much to ask at Costco on a Friday after 3:30PM? Perhaps!

Why don't they have an express lane at that place?! The naive economists' answer is that they'd rather encourage mad spending on each shopping trip. A cultural answer would point at some egalitarian sensibilities.

But, you see, it's not really egalitarian to ask me & some gigantic family laden with carb-bombs to stand in the same line. It's just not natural.

Costco might wish to consider a new addendum to their Mission Statement: "We subsidize our customers' insane lifestyle choices!!"

Sorry. I'll calm down about that ketchup now. Thank you for your indulgence.

Oh, I do still love Costco. And I did get out within five minutes, along the way inspiring two of those slow bigtime shoppers to smile.
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